LISTEN

I've never been one to make New Year's resolutions.  Partly because it's not really part of my personality and I've always had a pessimistic view of them.  Why make one if no one really keeps them anyways?

I was reading another blogger and instead of making a resolution, she chose a single word for 2017.  Something she wanted to define the year by.

There were lots of words that came to mind for me but I've landed on LISTEN.

I've recently realized that I am a terrible listener.  Or at least a lot worse than I thought I was.  (There's probably some "Amens!" out there from my family and friends).

I was listening to a lecture on leadership and the speaker said, "if you're thinking about what you're going to say next, you're not really listening."   Guilty.  I do that all the time.  I often think I need to have the answers or have a really good piece of advice to offer so while the other person is talking I'm thinking about how I would handle the situation or what to say to them next to share my opinion. Totally not listening.  

How would my relationships be different if I really listened?  If I removed my agenda, my opinions and ONLY listened?  It sounds kind of freeing actually.  I don't have to think about how I'm going to argue my point, give my opinion, or offer advice.  I just have to listen and really soak in what the person is trying to say.

It's usually pretty obvious if someone isn't really listening to you.  I want people to feel that they have my full attention because that's what makes people feel valued.  It's a way of telling them they are more important than the text message I just got or the to-do list that running through my mind.  And they are more important than my desire to look good and give "wise" advice.  Since when is advice giving wanted anyways?  Most people aren't looking for it unless they specifically ask for it.  They just want someone to listen.

This isn't going to be easy.  Since it's a resolution, it's bound to fail right?  But I'm still going to try and be better at it than I was yesterday.